Stealing Chicken

Hey pups,

It's been a while since I have written to my fans. Grandad has been at the hospital and I have been moving from pack to pack. We are staying with the Parcon pack for now while Grandad recovers. I haven't seen Grandad for a week. When can we go for a walk again?

Life in the Parcon pack is different. I get to see my sister all the time now! She tried sniffing my ear yesterday. I think she has a fetish for ears. I've learned from her that when someone opens the storm door, we need to bark as loud and as crazy as we can. Her hearing is better than mine, but I got the bigger bark. She also steals my big bed all the time. I have to snuggle into her small bed and I can't get any sleep. It's ok, sis, I steal your water so you will be dehydrated for the day. Revenge is a bitch isn't it? I have also learned, as long as my sister goes up the stairs first, I can follow her but then we both got punished by Dad. I made too much noise going up the stairs. I wasn't as stealth as my sister. Hey, I'm a big guy!

Shy and I were so bored yesterday. Sis, slept the whole day but I needed to do something mischievious. Only auntie B was there to look after us. As soon as she went up the stairs, I put my plan into action. I had 5 mins. In the kitchen there was chikcen. I smelt it from my bed. It was on the center table. WIth my Boxer skill, I climbed up on two legs, paws on the table. With one paw I grabed a chicken breast, and munched it down. With the other paw, I grabbed a second breast. This is G-rated by the way. Mission accomplished. No one would ever suspect a thing. Auntie B came down and panicked.

"Where'd the chicken go? Oh my gosh, Brix must have ate it! I better call Jason"
"Hello Jason? I think Brix ate the chicken. Ya, it was on the table."
"What? Were there any bones?"
"No, it was chicken breast."
"Oh auntie, he'll live. As long as there were no bones. But he's in big trouble when I get back!"

Dad came back mad. I had already forgotten what I did. "You stole chicken huh. Don't you worry, you're going to feel it tomorrow," Dad scolded me. I didn't really know what he meant but I understood this morning. I had diarrhea to kill! Oh my stomach didn't feel good. "I told you." Ok, Dad, you know best, I was wrong.

So today I get to see my friends at the daycare. I think Savannah officially dumped me so for all the lovely bitches out there, B-Stud is on the market and is shopping around. Call me.

B-Stud.